One might argue the planet is desperately trying to eject us, whether by dehydration in the Sahara or spontaneous air leaks on the ISS, yet humanity remains stubbornly resident. Back on Earth, the Americans are deporting murder victims for the grievous sin of failing to attend their own funerals, whilst the Russians treat the International Space Station like a dodgy DIY project. African leaders have decided that human rights are simply too 'foreign' for their new family charter, and the French are shocked to discover that ignoring potential predators might lead to predation. It is a thoroughly miserable Friday, so do savour your weekend.
Global Geopolitics and Ukraine Conflict Talks
Institutional Failures and Human Rights Abuses
Space Station Safety and Environmental Disasters
Menacing Industrial Two-Tone Ska
🎵 (s)Hit of the Day 🎵
📜 Lyrics 📜
[Intro]
[Sheet Metal Percussion]
[Distorted Farfisa Organ drone]
[Baritone Saxophone stabs]
[Verse 1]
[Spoken]
Up on the station, orbiting the earth
The cosmonauts are fixing things for all that it is worth
They've got the gaffer tape and they've got the wrench
Shut the hatches tight and don't get off the bench
The air is leaking out through a crack they cannot see
So colleagues shelter up in the military wing
It's handyman diplomacy in the vacuum of space
Another leaky bandage on the human race
[Chorus]
[Jeering sing-song delivery]
Oh, it's paperwork and panic from the Sahara to the stars
It's dehydration in the dust and rusting motor cars
Fill the forms in triplicate and pray the ink is dry
While the universe is slowly waving us goodbye
[Shout] Goodbye!
[Verse 2]
[Spoken]
Fifty souls in the desert where the lorry broke apart
No water in the canteen and a death inside the heart
Argentina's counting women in the figures and the facts
While France is asking questions that the bureaucracy lacks
They knew the killer's face and they'd seen him strut and stare
But the files were neatly stacked and no one seemed to care
Now a child is underground and the public wants to know
Why the system works so hard to let the monsters go
[Chorus]
[Jeering sing-song delivery]
Oh, it's paperwork and panic from the courthouses to the sand
It's a deportation order for a boy who'd left the land
Fill the forms in triplicate and stamp the page with lead
Because the immigration judge declared the teenager dead
[Shout] He's dead!
[Jagged Electric Guitar Upstrokes]
[Baritone Saxophone Solo]
[Sheet Metal Percussion breakdown]
[Verse 3]
[Spoken]
Zelensky's sending letters like a man who's lost the phone
Begging for a meeting with the man upon the throne
Ukraine's hitting cargo ships and drones in Romania blast
While Marco Rubio's digging up the shadows of the past
Sanctions on the Castro clan—a policy so new
It's got the vintage freshness of nineteen sixty-two
And somewhere in the drafting rooms they've found a threat so grave
Reproductive rights will make the family behave
[Bridge]
[Menacing, slower delivery]
The whales are leaving captivity for colder, kinder tanks
While the charter writers sharpen up their radical new planks
It's existential threat to hear a woman make a choice
The bureaucrats are shouting with a very quiet voice
[Eight-String Bass Guitar solo]
[Chorus]
[Jeering sing-song delivery]
Oh, it's paperwork and panic from the White House to the dunes
It's a desperate game of musical chairs and we're all out of tunes
Fill the forms in triplicate before the music ends
Because the losers get deleted by their closest friends
[Shout] Deleted!
[Outro]
[Spoken over industrial beat]
Sign here. Date there. Witness below.
Next of kin? Not applicable. No.
[Sheet Metal Percussion]
[Distorted Farfisa Organ fade]
[Final anvil strike]